Barbara Ramirez

Barbara Ramirez

The start of the trail.

The trail began in earnest after years of childhood schooling in the Episcopal Church, a brief flirtation with existentialism during college and an extended affair with atheism after graduation. I found all three perspectives increasingly dismal and disappointing.

But then in the mid 70’s some luminaries broke upon the scene – Paramahansa Yogananda taught me about reincarnation and the love of something higher, Edgar Cayce about the reality of extrasensory perception and advanced ancient cultures, Lawrence Blair about sacred geometry…. At the time I was a graphic artist and remember the simple joy of drawing out polygons in sequence starting with a triangle, square, pentagon, etc. using only a T-square and angle. The Platonic solids were fun, too. One year for Halloween I made a dodecahedron out of silver poster board. By leaving out one of the pentagonal sides, I could fit it perfectly over my head and wear it as a crown.

During this time I read the Bible cover to cover. I studied the Bhahagavad Gita, Vedanta and life of Krishna, that marvelous blue man. I still have a recipe box full of note cards comparing the teachings of Christ and Krishna, which in many ways were remarkably similar. Joan Grant’s series of “Far Memory” books fascinated me with her unapologetic exploration of her own previous lives. At the same time, my roomie and I had a really negative experience with Tarot cards. I have an aversion to them to this day.

In 1982 I married a man who was permanently angry with God. So, I voluntarily halted any further travels down the spiritual path to avoid his disapproval. Fortunately, a co-depencency workshop in 1987 woke me up. After the divorce with no further constraints on my personal process, in 1989 I plunged back into the New Age scene. Or as Elizabeth Clare Prophet dubbed it, the “world’s fair of psychic phenomenon.”

You name it, I explored it – Sufi dancing, crystals, 11:11 global dance celebrations, St. Germain, karmic astrology, Flower of Life, merkaba meditations, Tai Chi, Keys of Enoch….New Age and metaphysical book stores had cropped up everywhere. There was so much out there! Some of it was good, other sources gave me the creeps. Discernment became a valuable concept.